E3 is Magical, if not Offputting

I can’t stress enough how surreal it is to be at E3 in Los Angeles, CA. Genuinely a moment I never once thought was in the realm of possibility until the last couple years.

It’s been an interesting ride leading up to this. From my decision to get into content creation (game streaming, podcasting, and now blogging), it’s been a weird, up-and-down, uneven experience, where I’ve felt like nothing I’ve done has been up to par or “good enough” to get me here. Impostor Syndrome is a hell of a thing — I still don’t think I’m “good enough” to be here, something that has been plaguing me since the floor doors opened and people flooded the main thoroughfares of E3 2019.

E3 2019 logo
E3 is seriously special, in all the right ways

As a gamer, E3 was the mecca of gaming news; Gamer Christmas as it were. Something that the industry folks and chosen few get to experience, filtering the happenings through their own personal lens and sharing it with we “unwashed masses” who couldn’t make it to the event. To be honest, it feels the same to me still, even with me being at the event! I’m experiencing what the journalists I’ve looked up to since I was a little kid firsthand, and boy howdy do I feel out of place. I’m just a dude who likes talking about games; what have I done noteworthy that people think is good enough to send me here?

I know this post is a lot of self-doubting and negativity; forgive me on that. It’s just still a completely bizarre feeling that the Insert Coin Theater community has made this possible, yet I still feel strangely set-apart from the press and media here. We’re all hustling to grow and improve, but I can’t shake the feeling that I’m in over my head here. I’m just a dude, right?

E3 has been insane, in the most purely appreciated form of the word. Meeting a few big names I’ve always wanted to meet was definitely a wonderful experience — Alanah Pearce and Rahul Kohli at the Mixer industry event, and then Jack Patillo in the halls of E3 are all three gracious and kind folks, and their interactions with me is exactly why I am such a huge fan of theirs and why they are such big influences on my own content journey. But above all that, I’ve been privileged to spend time talking with game developers about their upcoming titles they’ve toiled on for years, and I’ve been blessed to see firsthand their pride and excitement at completing and delivering their passion projects to the masses, whether it be a AAA multi-million dollar effort or an indie title on a shoestring budget.

It’s been unreal, E3. The last day on the show floor is about to begin. Time to live it up.

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